I am also applying for the Chevening Scholarship which requires me to answer few question. I would like to seek advice or more likely to guide on the outline draft for my essay which sounds as mentioned below.
Outline why you have selected your chosen three university courses, and explain how this relates to your previous academic or professional experience and your plans for the future.
Hi Nethiyaa, it seems to me like the essay is asking you to pick 3 career paths based upon your interests or the college degree that you completed. You see, for each college or university that you choose to discuss in your essay, you should be able to justify your interest in the university through a connection with a future career path. So the essay, in my opinion, or rather, an example of your essay should look something like this:
1. I am interested in attending Le Cordon Bleu because of its well known Pastry program. In the future, I plan to become a pastry chef and.....
2. The classes at the Culinary Arts Institute appeal to me because, should I fail to become a pastry chef, my other plan is to open a restaurant...
3. The thought of attending Kendall College of Culinary Arts became obvious to me as a culinary graduate because of their...
Notice that all of the courses relate to that of a culinary major entering into masters degree studies. That is how it should be approached. Setting out 3 different career paths, which all happen to be related to a branch of your college degree. That will make it easier for you to write the statement because all of the topics go back to your completed degree and related work , academic, or internship experiences.
thank you for the example. i will post the essay once i am done and i hope you can help me to correct me.
Hi Nethiyaa, first of all, WELCOME to the Essay Forum Family, I hope this is just the start of an even more writing projects, we aim to provide you with the most credible and objective feedback in order for you to be able to revise and enhance your essay to make it better and to boost your confidence in submitting your essay.
Now, so you are aiming for one of the most sought after Chevening Scholarship and I believe, before making this decision, I assume you made loads of googling, reviewing, reading and investigating if you may, I say this because Chevening is one of those scholarships that most students and ambitious academic practitioner apply for, indeed, it's a tough one but I know that the rewards are absolutely outstanding.
So what do you write in your scholarship essay, well, I say two things that is very important;
- your academic background, journey and accomplishment
- your leadership background, achievements and goals
Once you have written this two, incorporate them to the mission and vision of the Chevening Scholarship and in the end, you should be able to showcase a parallel vision with the institution, should you be able to pull this through, you will be in good hands. Keep writing and post it here on EF so we can help you out.
Ever since I was little, there have been my dream always to pursue my tertiary education in UK universities but I failed to achieve during my undergraduate studies. I graduated as a chemical engineering student and my continued my intern on the health, safety, and environment. My interest on the HSE started in the final semester of engineering school when I studied the Environment Management System (EMS) where it is known as a system, which monitors, tracks and report emission information's particularly with respect of oil and gas industries. It made me engage the environmental aspects of it, and I was impressed by the fact that the field is so divergent and versatile.
A leading problem of 21st century is world pollution. The environments were polluted that urgent measures should be taken to save the world. A single individual cannot be blamed on for the world's contamination. Solid waste is also part of the environment pollution whereby it leads to much disease. The lack of public awareness, failure to enforce the existing law, techniques used to disposed waste collection impose to the complication. The governments are urging the companies and organizations, involved in manufacturing industry or agriculture in order to find environmental-friendly approaches.
Now, I am fortunate to attend my post-graduate studies at UK universities. Currently, I am working as health, safety, and environment (HSE) Engineer to provide technical guidance to ensure development, implementation, and improvement of environmental programs. As an Environment Engineer in my previous organization, I was assigned to improve environment condition through rectification. Besides that, the challenge faced during this phase is not the generation of solid waste but the lack of technologies to retrieve the energies from waste municipal produced at the landfill. My aim is to utilize these skills in reducing the emission of greenhouse gas by using the landfill. They also audit on the environmental conditions and criticize on the improvement of the world's environment.
Given the aforementioned, I have selected three courses that are similar continuity of work and will give me the knowledge, understanding, and practical insight required to advance in my career as HSE Engineer, these university courses are; Environment Engineering (Newcastle University), Environmental Engineering (Nottingham University) and finally Process Safety Management (University Aberdeen). The MSc in Environment Engineering, which offered at Newcastle and Nottingham University, is my desired program to do as it is well structured and universities work with employers to ensure that our masters reflects the skills needed in world or work. Besides, the laboratories have high wide range of instrumentation for testing and monitoring.
Studying in UK University will provide me with master's degree that will be identified worldwide. This course will lead me to a perfect start to my Environment Engineer back home. It will provide me courage, hand-skills, and knowledge to attain my long-term aim of being a consultant back home to give proper consultation and advice to all the company leaders. I aspire to the social and academic challenges of being a chevening scholar.
kindly advice me on the content of the essay and advise if i need to rectify the content of my essay.
You have deviated from the required discussion of the essay. You chose to concentrate solely on your early background, your current work, and a little on the future of your career. What the essay would like you to is discuss each course and university that you have chosen in greater detail. This is where the discussion of your future career comes into play. You need to be sure to show the reviewer that you have given great thought to your future and how you plan to achieve it. That can be done by discussing the university course, its related studies, and your expected career path that it can relate to.
As I see it, your first paragraph is irrelevant to the topic provided and should not be included. You should however, use the second paragraph as the introduction since it delivers on providing an insight as to why you might be interested in the following 3 careers. From there, you need to offer a paragraph each discussion of the course and the reason you chose the university to study in. You cannot group the areas of study under a common reason. You must reflect an analysis of your future career and an expectation of learning from each university you have chosen.
Hi Nethiyaa, that was fast for you to be able to write such an impressive essay, however, as impressive as it is, there are a few enhancements that can be done. specially to the focus of your essay, as mentioned, your essay should have both points covered with equal strength in your essay, this means you have to make sure that you are able to write both ideas that will make your essay stand out.
Now, lets take it one paragraph at a time, the first one started in a very negative side, it's not something that you want to start your essay with, now don't get me wrong you can still enhance your essay and its in every way manageable, I believe any negative or bad experiences will only make us strong, however, this doesn't apply to this project. Next, the 2nd and 3rd paragraph can be merged in one whole and compact paragraph, the 4th paragraph can still be strengthened by focusing on the highlights of your academic journey and in laying down your future goals.
Lastly, the last paragraph can be revised with the help of a 100% forward thinking paragraph that should showcase your aspirations and the steps that you will take to achieve them. I hope the above insights are helpful to further revise your essay.
thanks for the idea. i a bit stuck on the writing. could you please help me with the opening of the essay?
A leading problem of 21st century is world pollution. The environments are getting affected due to the behavior of each individual and leads to numerous incurable diseases. Atmospheric pollution gives life-frightening humanity with global warming and stratospheric ozone depletion. Lately, many issues arise such as improper waste treatment, lack of awareness on recycling, and soil and water contamination. Hence, the governments are urging the companies and organizations, involved in construction, fabrication industries, or agriculture in order to find environmental-friendly approaches. Therefore, close monitoring over the condition of the environment is being vital for today. Environment monitoring is referring to the systematic sampling, observation, and the level of pollution on the air, water, and soil.
As an Environment Engineer in my previous organization, I am responsible for designing system; install the safety and environment aspect system to ensure the public is protected from the pollution. Besides, I also have to ensure that the treated and untreated chemicals are disposed in accordance to the environment and health law. Moreover, the challenge faced during this phase is not the generation of solid waste but the lack of technologies to retrieve the energies from waste municipal produced at the landfill. My aim is to utilize these skills in reducing the emission of greenhouse gas by using the landfill. Given the aforementioned, I have selected three courses that are similar continuity of work and will give me the knowledge, understanding, and practical insight required to advance in my career as Environment Engineer, these university courses are; Environment Engineering (Newcastle University), Environmental Engineering (Nottingham University) and finally Process Safety Management (University Aberdeen). Specifically my choices of universities are as follows;
1. The MSc in Environment Engineering, which offered at Newcastle, is my desired program to do as it is well structured and universities work with employers to ensure that our masters reflects the skills needed in world or work. Besides, the laboratories have high wide range of instrumentation for testing and monitoring. This university also provides the most comprehensive overview of higher education that includes student satisfaction with the quality of teaching.
2. While, my second choice is MSc in Environment Engineering at Nottingham University provides a unique combination of engineering skills with relevance to the environment industry. Besides, the relationship formed between the alumnus, students, and lecturers are very well supportive. This university is in the 75th ranking and I believe it is one of the popular universities among the students and employers.
3. Finally, University of Aberdeen as Process Safety Management(PSM) deviates from my goals and aims above but it is a detailed of understanding of the risk assessments, operational safety and management. They also have an excellent reputation on teaching quality and the module for the courses is well designed.
Studying in UK University will provide me with master's degree that will be identified worldwide. This course will lead me to a perfect start to my Environment Engineer back home. I aspire to the social and academic challenges of being a chevening scholar.
Kindly help me to revise the essay with some editing on the content. Much appreciated.
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My Future Career Plans - With A Free Essay Review
PROMPT: My future career plans, why I want and need to study in the US at the graduate level, and how I hope to contribute to my country's democratic and economic development.
My name is Levan, Im 23 years old. I was born in small city Dusheti, where i started learning. In 2000 I won the olympics in mathematics and I came to the school of physics and mathematics Comarovi in tbilisi, which I successfully graduated in 2005. I have obtained my Bachelors Degree from the business administration faculty of the Georgian American University in Georgia in 2009. and i was the best student of the university. Through the entire 4 years of courses I acquired comprehensive knowledge in a wide range of subjects like Corporate Finance, Derivative Markets, Valuation of Financial Assets, Fixed Income Securities, Strategic Managment, and others. I was taught by many experienced teachers who were glad to share their theoretical and practical knowledge in relative fields. By some of them I was inspired to broaden out my theoretical knowledge implementing it into practice and offered to get involved in some projects related to my major. So I started my first activity at Information center of NATO.
I was explaining to people what the NATO is, its history, why is our countrys goal to become a member of alliance and etc. It was my first experience to work with team and manage it.
In 2008 I began working in the company universalcom. I was director there. I worked in the company since its foundation and became the one of the best in distribution sector. I worked there until 2010 Then I was in the army until June 2011 and after finising it I went to work in USA company JSC open revolution georgia. They brought an innovative mobile financial services in Georgia , and I am working there very . successfully.
I have ambitious career goals and plans for my future life and believe this program can help me reach these goals. I want to be best top manager, and To be a leader and professional in my case. I know I can achieve something in my life only after the implementation of my planned goals, in the success of which I believe. In order to take the path to my career, I must improve my skills, enrich my knowledge and obtain experience in the field which Im going to study. This program gives me an opportunity and I must use this opportunity to study in the US.
A good educational background and ability to use it in beneficial conditions is a significant point in rising along career stairs.
Masters Degree in Business administration from US University will be a great step forward in my self-development and career as well as this country is known all over the World for the best educational system comparing to other universities. USA's advanced education system will surely further develop my skills acquired in Georgia and make them professional. My commitment to my education is strong and I know that, if I graduate MBA in USA, I will get exactly the skills and experience which is inevitable to build my future career.
Our country wants to see our contributions to making a powerful and developing country. When I get my postgraduate certificate, I will go back to Georgia to work in goverment or private sector towards improving and strengthening the management system, through sharing my experiences with managers, and not only them, by organizing specialized training courses. Also I can participate the development of business creating sector , management of business and management education level. Business sectors development within the country means overall progress of my countrys economy and my peoples life. I love Georgia, and I intend to do everything in its economic and democratic development.
You begin to respond to the prompt directly in the final two paragraphs. The penultimate paragraph, which addresses the question of why you want and need to study in the US is quite vague. The argument that U.S. education is great is rather general (and not true _in general_). If you specified that program you want to enroll in and why, you might have something more concrete and meaningful to say. Your final paragraph deals with what you intend to do on your return to Georgia. This paragraph is a little bit clearer, but not by much. It would be a good idea to specify what you mean by the management system, especially if you mean something, as you apparently do, that is applicable to both government and the private sector. The essay says next to nothing about democratic development, but knowing nothing about the program for which you are applying, Ive no idea how important that is. I suggest, in any case, expanding the last two paragraphs, with a view to making their claims more specific, and condensing the rest of the essay. Keep your sentences relatively short and simple in order to minimise the number of errors.
Submitted by: levani